Dreaming of You
by Mitsue aka Marina
Summary: This is a song fic about a girl dreaming for love. I hope it isn't too sap-filled (although a little sap can't hurt). Set to Selena's 'Dreaming of You'


Title: Dreaming of You   
Author: Mitsue  
Status: 1/1  
Rating: G  
Summary: One of our favorite female characters contemplating her love.  
Disclaimer: Icky, my least favorite part. I don't like admitting this, but I do not own HA! or any of its characters. Those belong to the wonderful Craig Bartlett. And the song 'Dreaming Of You', as some Selena fans might notice, doesn't belong to me. Pity, it's such a beautiful song. Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy, plus Pride and Prejudice and everything else Jane Austen-y belongs to... who else, Jane Austen!   
  
*****  
  
[Late at night when all the world is sleeping  
I stay up late and think about you and I wish on a star  
That somewhere you are thinking of me too]  
  
*****  
  
I stared up at the sky, laid out above me like a roll of black velvet studded with diamonds. My head was filled with many thoughts of one subject. Him. I couldn't stop thinking of him. He was the reason I was up at this unthinkable hour- 1:44, according to my clock- wishing on stars and entertaining the thought that he may be doing the same.   
  
I know how this must look to you; a hopeless dreamer wasting her nights away, wishing up dumb imaginings and making believe that her school girl crush really loves her as much as she loves him.  
  
Such is the stereotype.  
  
But really, I would like if you ignored the stereotype and listen to my story. I promise you, it will not be boring.  
  
Now, where was I? Oh yes, I was wishing on a star.   
  
*****  
  
['Cause I'm dreaming of you tonight  
'Til tomorrow I'll be holding you tight  
And there's nowhere in the world I'd rather be  
Than here in my room dreaming about you and me]  
  
*****  
  
Not long after I make my fifth wish, I feel the tempting comfort of sleep invade my senses. I try at first to resist, wanting to stay at my window longer, but I finally give up. Hey, I'm only ten, I need my sleep. I reluctantly walk away from my window and collapse onto my bed, hugging one of my pillows fiercely, pretending it was him. I wrap my blanket around myself to keep out the usual New York winter chill and allow myself to sink into sleep. I unconsciously smile blissfully as dreams of him and me pervade my usually sensible head.  
  
*****  
  
[Wonder if you ever see me and I wonder if you know I'm there  
If you looked in my eyes would you see what's inside  
Would you even care]  
  
*****  
  
Ah, time has passed. I am thirteen years old, taller, more mature- and still dreaming of him. Some habits you can't break, I guess. Although he isn't a habit anymore. Some people would say he's an obsession; I say he's an un-removable part of my soul.  
  
I'm sorry if I sound a little sappy, but I really can't help it.  
  
Over the last three years, he has noticed me less and less, to my great disappointment. Another great disappointment to me was when he started dating. Rhonda, Nadine, Sheena, even Lila! Needless to say, I have shunned these girls since.  
  
My best friend comforts me, saying one day he'll notice me for the beauty I am, like I do whenever she's disappointed about her love. Lately, we have gotten into chick flicks and Jane Austen, having more slumber parties than we usually do, mope around about our 'guys' at said parties.   
  
It's nice to have a friend during these hard years. I know she will always be there for me. That's the beauty of friendship.  
  
I remember one particular conversation from one of our slumber parties (moping parties sounds better). I think this is how it went:  
  
" Are you feeling okay?" she asks me in a British accent. (The same accent we always fall into after we watch Jane Austen movies)  
  
" He's going out with Lila again." I reply, still feeling bitter after what I witnessed that afternoon at school. You see, I was outside the school with the other kids, waiting for my bus to arrive. I remember glancing over and seeing Lila flirting with my 'obsession'. I can't recollect my exact thoughts, but I'm sure the word 'vixen' was in there. My heart froze when I saw her lean over and kiss him. The worst part was that he liked it. But my heart didn't break there.   
  
I supposed it had broken the first time I saw him with Rhonda, his first in a string of girlfriends. He was a ladies' man for sure. After that, my heart got bandaged up, sort of healed but still hurting. But it still cracked every time I saw him with another girl.   
  
But that time, it cracked harder. I almost burst out into tears right there. But I didn't.   
  
Back at the moping party, my friend said, " Oh, my dear friend, I still think that he must be a perfect git to go with Lila."  
  
I giggled, feeling better already. " At least your love isn't dating anyone."  
  
" Doesn't mean he likes me." She answered, her previously jovial voice becoming more serious.  
  
" I bet that you're going to get married to him." I told her in an attempt to raise her spirits.   
  
" If I get married to him, then that's a definite sign that you two will get married." She responded firmly, " Look at Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy. They hated each other, but they ended up getting married."  
  
" Speaking of Lizzie and Darcy, I got 'Pride and Prejudice'." I proudly waved the set of videos in the air.  
  
And the conversation ended there.  
  
*****  
  
[I just wanna hold you close but so far  
All I have are dreams of you  
So I wait for the day and the courage to say  
How much I love you  
  
I'll be dreaming of you tonight  
'Til tomorrow I'll be holding you tight  
And there's nowhere in the world that I'd rather be  
Than here in my room dreaming about you and me]  
  
*****  
  
More years pass; I am now eighteen and very close to high school graduation. Things have been pretty much the same with him. Though once in junior year I was his partner in Science, but that only led to a renewal of the same tiny friendship that we had when we were nine. He doesn't talk to me a lot though; he's either with his best friend or his girlfriend, Lila. It turns out that that one little kiss they had when they were thirteen led to a serious relationship that would last forever. Whoopie.  
  
It was quite disgusting, how they acted sometimes. Acts of public affection that normally wouldn't tick off anybody, but I surely got perturbed. They often exchanged notes and lovey-dovey glances during classes, the same things I often dreamed of him doing with me. And since he was on my left, and Lila was on my right, these notes often went flying over me, sometimes bonking me in the head. And they expected me to pass it on to the other one after an incident like that happened!  
  
As I unlocked my car door, I spotted the two in his vintage mustang. They were kissing, he in the driver's seat, and she standing outside his door. I threw them an 'I-am-completely-sickened' look (not like they noticed) and got into my car, making sure to slam the door really loudly.  
  
My cell phone beeped as I tried to maneuver my vehicle out of the parking lot. It is my best friend, I soon discovered, inquiring about a book I borrowed. The conversation soon ended, and I drove home still in a bad mood from what I saw.   
  
Later that night, I had holed myself up in my room. I was busy with my new senior yearbook, marking out all of Lila's pictures with a red pen. Permanent, I might add.  
  
After I was done with all of my destruction, I noticed it was a particularly starry night. I immediately leapt up and jumped over to my window, looking for a particular star.   
  
I finally spotted it and started to make my wish.   
  
" I wish..." The words stuck in my throat. I tried again. " I wish..."  
  
It was then I thought, 'What am I doing? Recreating some childish ritual? Give up, girl. You're never getting him.'  
  
I tried to silence that pesky voice and I finally got it to shut up after fifteen minutes of self-conviction. I still felt down, however. That stupid voice did its job. I sat down on my bed and grabbed a pillow.   
  
I curled up on my bed and began to sob. After a while I found I could cry no more and fell asleep from sheer exhaustion, where dreams of me and him filled my head. I guess that voice didn't do as well as I thought.  
  
*****  
  
[Late at night when all the world is sleeping  
I stay up and think of you  
And I still can't believe that  
You came up to me and said  
I love you  
I love you too]  
  
*****  
  
Twenty-five year old me calmly walked into the apartment I shared with my best friend. I locked the door, absentmindedly waved 'hello' to my friend, and walked into my bedroom. I closed the door... and preceded to dance happily around the room. After I had danced for five minutes, I fell on my bed and sighed happily, ignoring the knocks on my door.  
  
You see, one of the best moments of my life happened twenty-five minutes before. And that was the moment that he said " I love you." to me! Not to Lila, but me! And then he kissed me! I could have died happy right then.  
  
All that dreaming hadn't been wasteful after all. I had been pretty hopeless about us ever since the end of high school. But ever since college graduation when my friend had heard those three beautiful words come out of her love's mouth, I had begun to see that there was still a chance. Turns out there was. Turns out that I am now the happiest woman in the world!  
  
" Are you okay in there!" That's my friend there, probably wondering whether I've gone insane or not. I jump off my bed and open the door, where I literally drag my friend in to tell her the news.  
  
*****  
  
[I'll be dreaming with you tonight  
'Til tomorrow and for all of my life  
And there's nowhere in the world I'd rather be  
Than here in my room dreaming with you endlessly]  
  
*****  
  
And tonight I stand here, twenty-seven years old and just married!   
  
The wedding was what I had always dreamed of. Big church, big guest list, big cake. After a year of touring the country for signings of her first book, my best friend has finally arrived home in time for the wedding. She showed up with her husband and the news that they were expecting a baby! The wedding was too wonderful. Of course Lila wasn't invited. That makes it more wonderful.   
  
And as I stand here at this hotel window, watching my love sleep like an angel, my mind ventures towards memories of my old habit of wishing. I look up at the star-studded sky and manage to find my old wishing star. And I wished for... hey, I'm not telling you. If I do, it won't come true.  
  
So my point is that dreams can come true. Or else my name isn't Phoebe Hyerdahl-Johanssen.  
  
The End 


End file.
